fools we work with
As some of you know, i’m a manager at my place of business, which for the sake of covering my gigantic ass, will remain nameless. Anyway, there was recently a job fair, and we would accept applications and do screening/interviews on the spot.
Flashback to September 2000. there were these two employees who were really good friends, and went to school together. One of them was a *really* big guy, the other one was rather small and weasle-ish. The managers all referred to the big one as “Big Dumb guy,” because, well, he was a big, dumb guy. the other one was appropriately called “little dumb guy.”
anyway, big dumb guy gets fired (by me) for theft, and is not rehireable as a result. shortly thereafter, little dumb guy quits. He could have been rehireable, but on his last day, as a prank, switched the coke lines with the sprite lines on our main soda machine. (those of you who work or have worked in foodservice know *why* thats such a big deal) No rehire for him. Since that time both of these imbeciles have come up to the stand I run once a week to harass my employees (who they think are their friends). Essentially, they have no lives. at all.
Fast forward to 2001. So both of these toolsheds come up to this job fair, and decide to put in applications in an attempt to get their jobs back. Theres myself and one other manager from the same department doing the interviews for that job fair. They spend 45 minutes filling out applications, and all of us at the other end of the auditorium are just cracking up. These guys seriously didn’t realize that we were totally busting up at their expense.
these guys come up and sit at the same table as me and the other manager, and the other manager says to them “You guys think you’re cute? Seriously, you think this shit is funny?” I looked at them and said “You’ve just wasted 45 precious minutes of your life. Way to go.” They looked at me, kind of confused looks on their faces, and I continued, “Seriously, you could have spent the last hour at your houses playing video games or jerking off. Neither one of you can be rehired. You should really leave now.”
They looked at each other, shrugged, and walked away.